The Power of Support
Posted By: Emily Elling
Emily Elling lives downtown Indianapolis with her husband of 10 years and her four unintentionally hilarious children, Piper, 7, Nola, 5, Gage, 2, and baby Paul, born January 2012.
It goes without saying that there is no way I could be the mom that I am, without my husband and the father to my four children by my side. Honestly, I just couldn't do it. I mean, if I had to I obviously would, I wouldn't crawl into a hole and die, but it would be unbearably hard. I pray everyday that I'll never be put in a situation where I have to parent alone.
Because by the end of the day, I oftentimes feel like I'm drowning. 5:30 PM hits me like a ton of (Lego) bricks, and I'm in desperate need of a proverbial life jacket to be throw my way. My husband Michael is my saving grace, my life vest that keeps my head (barely) above water.
When I look back at the past 8 years we've been parenting together, he's supported me in ways I never knew possible. One thing I love about the way he loves me, is how he doesn’t question my decision to parent "against the grain".
Society is quick to tell you exactly how you're suppose to raise a child, so if you decide to do it any other way, be prepared to defend yourself. He’s always defends me.
For instance, he didn't call me crazy when I wanted an unmedicated birth and decided to hire a doula for my labor and delivery. Even though I know it secretly made him a bit uncomfortable having a "stranger" in the room with us, he supported my decision regardless.
And he fully supports my decision to breastfeed, and helps any way possible. He gives me extra time with Paul, and picks up the slack with the other kids while I nurse. And if need to feed Paul in public (which I'm still self-conscious about but working on), he helps me get situated and makes sure I'm comfortable.
With my son (who's now almost 3), I found myself wanting to extend my breastfeeding relationship past the one year mark. In social situations where I found myself getting the "shifty eye" for still nursing what now was a toddler and not a baby, he stayed supportive. Gah, I love him for that.
It's true, dad's can't birth babies, and they can't breastfeed. But that doesn't mean that they can't offer the most amazing love and support to their partner.
photo credit: www.mooshinindy.com9:01am on Thursday June 14